The Langley, a Luxury Collection Hotel, Buckinghamshire

Really not up to par for what’s advertised as super 5*! Had to change rooms in archival because ours was smoked out from the kitchen. The suite was nice and generally well appointed but still issues! Notably the hairdryer was missing the safety filter on the back so i caught up and burnt off a huge chunk of my hair. Turn down service came early and when asked to come back later, didn’t. The room was generally noisy and I was particularly miffed at being woken up 08:10 by staff loading their trolley outside the door for 15 mins having a chat and bashing about. Why store toiletries in a cabinet outside one of your best suites is beyond me! There was no way to know about breakfast and when we called down to reception late after supper they said they would take an order but couldn’t tell us what our options were. Ended up paying a £30 ish for one coffee and some cold mini pastries. Spa changing facilities are very impressive BUT having been in them once we didn’t go back. Both the pool & jacuzzi were full of dirt and sand and no explanation from staff when asked. Massages very average at best. Lots of equipment in the pool area didn’t work. Plus sides… resturant is great. Bar was good. Built environment impressive. Service needs serious attention. We were told a manager would be in contact, 3 weeks later, nothing.

Beautiful place, but shockingly poor management — worst service I’ve experienced at a luxury hotel This property is absolutely stunning, but it’s managed terribly. I have honestly never experienced worse service in a luxury hotel. It’s not family-friendly at all, and they clearly dislike guests with children — the staff were invasive and openly rude throughout our stay. I’m a Platinum Bonvoy member, so I know what to expect at high-end hotels. Through the app, they take over three hours to reply to messages, if they answer at all. Room service arrived cold, and one day they brought the wrong order entirely. ⚠️ Be extremely careful with check-out. The experience here is nothing like what you’d find at a Ritz, St. Regis, or Four Seasons. There were repeated attempts to double charge me. It took over an hour to fix the bill: every time they removed a duplicate charge, the system would add new service fees automatically — it felt like a setup to overcharge guests. My total went from £3,000 down to £1,200 after removing duplicate charges and automatic “tips” they’d added just for breakfast service or greetings. They also have ponies on the property. Upon arrival, a lady told us, in front of my 2- and 4-year-old children, that “badly behaved kids” had fed them and killed one pony, and the other was very sick. I found the comment completely inappropriate. The next day, another staff member explained that the ponies are actually allergic to certain acorns from a nearby tree (they even showed me which one), and that’s why they installed the electric fence — the story I’d been told at the lobby wasn’t true at all. Check every bill carefully. They charged one of my bills three times. The manager eventually fixed it after finding unsigned tickets they had to manually remove. They asked me not to report it and to keep the incorrect statements. When I refused, they deleted my entire 5-night stay from the system and reported to Bonvoy that we never stayed there. Once I returned home and saw the nights weren’t credited, I filed a report. Mistakes happen, but this wasn’t a mistake — this was dishonest, and ultimately theft from both the owner and the guests. The only good people where Paul and the bartender at the Winston Churchill Room — she makes incredible drinks and was genuinely kind, as well the cleaning lady.

Stayed here twice in a short span of 3 weeks - both times in the Brewhouse. Rooms are decent sized and fairly well set up, with modern furnishing and various lighting options that help to moderate the lighting. On both occasions service was prompt and welcoming. Grounds are quite beautiful though not as large as other “countryside” hotels. For those with kids they have a playground and some pet goats. Location wise it is close to Heathrow and also not far from wonderful restaurants in Bray / Maidenhead as well as Windsor (all within 15-20 min drive). Overall I had good stays on both occasions though it is slightly expensive for what it is.